The Personal Space Invader

Our youngest dog, Remington, is what I like to call a “Personal Space Invader.”  The pup has absolutely no concept of the appropriate amount of space to leave between himself and a person.  He is a 75 pound lap dog.  He wakes up my father in law when they puppy sit by sitting 2 inches from his face and quietly growling.  This weekend, while at the Alabama Symphony Orchestra’s concert at Railroad Park, he actually discretely crawled to a complete stranger and invited himself to sit in her lap.  I was mortified.  She thought it was hilarious.  Well, we all thought it was hilarious.  It’s just his personality.  He doesn’t know any different.  Remi just wants to be close to you because he loves you and wants to be petted.  While I am always up for puppy snuggles, it took a little getting used to with Remington.  He just gets SO close to you.  It has a tendency to become a bit claustrophobic. 

You see, I am a big fan of personal space.  I have a bubble, if you will.  I don’t let just anyone in my bubble.  I don’t voluntarily do hugs until I know someone well AND like them.  So if you have received a hug from me it is generally because I like you and feel comfortable around you.   I also work in human resources which only reinforces my need for personal space.  If someone invades your personal space at work and it happens to make you feel uncomfortable, you usually end up talking to me.  Stay with me here.  I know this seems like pointless rambling, but I do have a point…

Yoga teachers are a lot like Remington.  They have no concept of personal space.  And why would they?  Their job includes touching people to make various adjustments to their poses.  You cannot effectively explain in words how someone should properly hold his/her hips in Parsvottanasana (Extreme Side Stretch).  You have to move their hips into proper alignment.  This is completely normal to a yoga instructor.  This is not completely normal to Danielle. 

The first time an instructor adjusted me in a pose it startled me…a lot.  I didn’t know what to do.  I just froze.  My only thought was, “Why is this woman touching my hips? WHY?!”  After a few moments, when I calmed down, I realized that her intentions were pure.  She was just trying to make sure that I did not do the pose improperly and hurt myself or not feel the full stretch, but it certainly took a little getting used to. 

The best personal space invasion I have witnessed to this date was in our Ashtanga Primary Series Workshop.  There was a guy in his 20s who was clearly heavily involved in Cross Fit.  I got the impression he was attending the class to get a different perspective on fitness.  He was new to yoga, and had no clue what was about to happen.  The instructor announced at the beginning of the class that if you were sensitive to being touched, just let him know and he would respect that.  No one spoke up.  The class progressed as usual. (Ashtanga is a set series of poses, so you always know what to expect.)  As we went into Marichyasana C (where you are seated on the ground using your knee to assist you in twisting your spine) the Cross Fit guy was struggling.  The instructor came by to try to assist him into the pose.  After attempting to muscle him into the pose for a bit he realized that he was going to have to take a more aggressive approach.  All we heard was, “Ok, buddy.  We are going to get sweaty…”  He then proceeded to straddle Cross Fit guy and used his entire body to assist him in the pose.  Cross Fit guy was clearly not a fan, but he was a good sport.  This type of thing is not uncommon in most yoga classes.  Sometimes it requires the entire body to help someone into a pose.  You get used to it. 

In every yoga class since then, the teacher has invaded my personal space to make an adjustment.  I have become accustomed to it.  I appreciate it.  I even look forward to it with my favorite instructors.  If you are one who does not like to be touched and are considering going to a yoga class, I recommend speaking to the instructor before class starts.  Most are sensitive to the fact that some of us need some time to get used to the idea of being touched by a complete stranger.  Give yourself the time you need to adjust; hopefully, it will come more naturally as you get more comfortable around the instructor.  After all, it is their job. 

*UPDATE – June 16, 2012*  When I use the term “Personal Space Invader,” I use it as a term of endearment.  It describes my sweet Remington and awesome yoga instructors, not the creepy guy at the office that stands two inches from you to talk.  The term is reserved for those with pure intentions.  Touch and yoga are really inseparable.  While my first experience in a yoga class caught me quite off guard, I quickly learned that it’s not a complete yoga class without some personal attention from the instructor.  Truthfully, I had the same type of response with my first professional massage, and the masseuse was a friend of the family.  The intent of this post was to give a glimpse into how yoga has helped me get out of my personal comfort zone, which is something I struggle with on a daily basis.